One glance at my reflection in a store window as I passed by gave me a glimpse of who I was right then in that moment and place. My makeup was carefully applied, my outfit was matched with jewelry to complement it, and I'd chosen a purse to match. I looked put together and smiled back at myself.
After picking through clothing for sale, I walked with a few hopeful items in hand and headed for the changing room to see if they really looked as good on me as I had hoped when I selected them.
Oh, but the bright fluorescent bulbs of this white painted cubicle sent their unflattering rays to highlight all the imperfections and exaggerate the weight and wrinkles that I have accumulated over the years. On second thought, I might not buy anything today, for I sadly faced the fact of what others see when they look at me.
In the window reflection, I saw a gentler picture that made me still feel pretty and spry as I quickly walked up to the shop's door.
Inside, though, the insidious dressing room mockingly reflected my stark image, leaving nothing to chance. Soft lines defined my cheekbones, but I had no slender waist or legs; instead, there was evidence of a slower metabolism, and my hair had grayed, revealing to the world that I was living the latter part of my life. Maybe I was also less significant?
But there was the contradiction. I looked closer at the reflection, and my eyes, which are the window to my soul, told me that my soul and spirit were still young and alive. The color of my hazel eyes has not changed. Little tinges of light brown mingled with the dominant green. Only the skin around them gave me away.
I decided to seek the opinion of another greater One. My Creator. So, when I was alone at home, I wrote in my journal, "How do You see me?"
God gently replied, "You are worried about the condition of your earth suit? Don't you know that it is temporary? Don't you know that within you is the real you who will go on living forever? And if I go to prepare beautiful mansions and landscapes that will take your breath away, I also have an excellent plan for your appearance throughout eternity. The essence of your spirit is who you are, so do not be concerned about the deterioration of the outer part of you. Life on earth is but a few seconds in comparison to eternity."
"Remember," he continued, "I am the potter who designed you perfectly with all that you need when you walk with me to fulfill your destiny. Does the clay talk back to the fingers that are molding it?"
That rang a bell. I looked up that phrase and found where Paul said these very words. Hosea was also quoted there, telling the people God's words, in Romans 9, "I'll call nobodies and make them somebodies; I'll call the unloved and make them beloved; In the place where they yelled out, 'You're nobody!' they're calling you 'God's living children.”
God does not consider us a number, like the grains of sand, but by our choice, as we come to Him, He embraces us back into His family and calls us by name.
Do not be like the blind who mock you and only value you as long as you are helpful to their gain. Ignore them. When they mock, know that it is because you are God's living child.
God continued, “You were designed for a purpose, to reflect my nature and my glorious light on this earth. Your parents were chosen just for you, and you were chosen just for them. Be at peace and do not judge yourself by the world's standards, but know that you are beloved by a merciful, just, and loving God. You are my delight, as are all of my children. You are all my favorite ones.”
Now, I will not minimize the effectiveness of my mission based on my outward aging appearance. I thank God for creating me with His purpose in mind. I embrace the gifts, His presence, and the molding that has taken place over the years to get to this place.
I smile and am glad for this time in my life, when I can share this hope, this forgiveness, and this eternal victory of Jesus, which eludes the view of many who are distracted by chaos, struggle, or a lack of concern for humanity. The gods of this world have minimized the precious value of individuals in the eyes of those who do not share this faith.
I thank God for my husband who has been given the eyes of God for me. He tells me how beautiful I am. He sees me when I have no makeup. He listens, values, and considers my thoughts.
To him, I am not obsolete or an antique to be discarded. God has given him eyes to see who I am inside, and the gray hairs, the wrinkles, and my imperfect body mass do not take away from my worth.
